my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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