My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
we're so committed to being not committed
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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