Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
