GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!