So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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