ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
