so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
soo... how was my night?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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