if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize