Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
