4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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