very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
