i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
