Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize