We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
This girl is more easily done than said...
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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