Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
so much tequila, so little girl.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
