Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night