I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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