I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize