Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
