Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
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