Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
