Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
