I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Slut skills are useful in every country.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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