Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I just gargled with NyQuil
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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