its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
