is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
