u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
