Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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