i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
