He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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