1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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