May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize