Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
