So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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