with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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