i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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