i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
