your room smells of hookers.
And success
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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