You can't special order awesome
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
