I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
