it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
