The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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