i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize