i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
