Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?