even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i dont even know how to be here
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
