Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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