I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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