We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
