I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize