Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize