coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Randomize
